Tuesday, February 10, 2009

my inner nerd

An abstract for a paper I wrote for my comics class (yes, I'm taking a class in grad school on comics) on Watchmen was accepted to an academic conference--The Living Text 2009--at CSUF. I've got mixed feelings about it all.

On the one hand, I'm very excited to know that my hard work is taking me places and I'll have the chance to have my work heard. I mean, this is what grad students are supposed to do. I sort of feel official now. On the other, I'm frightened of speaking for 20 minutes in front of a large group of really smart strangers, turning beet red, looking like I can't breathe, sounding like I have a Birmingham accent because It's impossible for me to breathe, etc.

These are all valid fears because they've happened to me before. I'm hoping that one day all of these things that happen to me when I get really nervous will never happen again because I'll somehow get over my fear of speaking in public to my peers or superiors.

Strange, but this never happened to me when I taught ESL. I think it was because I spoke English and my students, well, didn't.


Richelle said...

i love you dan! you are great and you will do great. (my body goes crazy like that when i sing in front of people, i wonder if i have an accent when i'm singing? :)

Cal said...

Take a muscle relaxer. I can just imagine you in front of all those people like so chill :) You'd have like a hippie accent instead of a Birmingham accent, "the guy haas a coostuume fetish.. maaan." I took a Valium once before I sang in front of a group (shhh) and I wasn't nervous at all. I felt totally calm. I'm not saying to take drugs, I'm just saying they help okay?! You'll do great. I want to come hear what you have to say!